


SIN

by thequadraticformula



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Body Worship, F/F, Homophobia, Seven Deadly Sins, Smut, yuck - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:08:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22570744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thequadraticformula/pseuds/thequadraticformula
Summary: Pride, Greed, Lust, Envy, Gluttony, Wrath, Sloth.Dahyun doesn't think.She would commit any sin in the world if it was for Momo.
Relationships: Hirai Momo/Im Nayeon, Hirai Momo/Kim Dahyun, Hirai Momo/Kim Heechul, Son Chaeyoung/Yoo Jeongyeon
Comments: 13
Kudos: 38





	1. VIRTUE

**Author's Note:**

> This work is crossposted on Wattpad and Asianfanfics under the user 'thequadraticformula'.  
> DO NOT REPOST THIS WORK.

"I'll kill myself if you don't go out with me." Hirai Momo's voice trembled as she stood on the edge of the second-floor balcony of the creative arts block. There is a railing that keeps her from jumping without climbing over, but the way her hands are positioned makes it entirely a possibility. There was a crowd of students below, forming a semicircle around the piece of ground directly underneath where Momo was standing. Everyone was staring at the man that stood in front of her.

"Don't... don't be stupid, Momo-ssi." His voice was equally as shaky. "We can t-talk about this later. Somewhere else." The man's name was Kim Heechul. A senior medical student. The whole university knew of Momo's obsession with him. But then again, she had a different 'obsession' every other week. This was nothing new.

"I'll do it. I will." Momo pulled herself up, so she was seated on the railing, her legs dangling down like strings blowing in the breeze. "I'll jump."

There were gasps in the crowd below as Momo inched herself forward slightly.

"Momo-ssi..." Heechul moved forward slightly. "We should... really talk somewhere else. You'll get hurt." His expression was pained. This had happened so many times before. So many different people. "You should be asking for help if you feel like this. I know some people who –"

"The only thing that will cure me of these thoughts is for you to love me back." Momo interrupted. She seemed to be only _just_ balancing on that railing. It was only a matter of seconds before...

"OKAY! OKAY! I'LL GO OUT WITH YOU!" It all happened so quickly that the majority of the crowd missed it. A blink and then they were looking up to see Kim Heechul's hands wrapped around Hirai Momo's middle, her body limply hanging from his grip. They all knew she had pushed herself off. There was a grin plastered on her face, her cheeks rosy and her eyes half lidded.

Nobody knew why Momo was like this. She was a dance major going after boys and girls just to have sex and then dump them. A few puny dates and a fuck and she was moving on. Some people respected her in some sick sort of way.

_It takes a lot of skill to pull off a stunt like that and still get the girl._

_Hirai Momo always gets what she wants. Guess I might try killing myself... maybe that will work?_

_She is living the bisexual, sex addict life to the fullest._

But most just thought she was stupid. Dahyun was no exception to this majority. She thought Momo was stupid in more ways than one.

"Is she actually suicidal? Or..." Jihyo asked Dahyun as they walked side by side, past the dissipating crowd and toward the door of the music room.

"I think she just likes the attention." Dahyun wanted to end that sentence with a _bad word_ but restrained herself. She guessed she would have to go to confession after practice was over.

"That much? Enough to die?" Jihyo held the glass door open, allowing Dahyun to step in first. She was quickly seated at the keyboard, pulling out the sheet music she was still yet to memorise.

"I don't think she would ever take the step off that edge without being certain that someone would catch her." Dahyun started her scales, warming up her fingers. "She really needs some prayers her way."

Jihyo rolled her eyes as she dumped her tote bag beside Dahyun's keyboard and leaned against the wall.

"Stop trying to enforce your religion into ever single... conversation." Jihyo stopped herself from using the word 'fucking' because if Dahyun heard her say it, she would never hear the end of it. Dahyun was... difficult to be friends with sometimes.

"Prayer is nice." Dahyun replied, finishing her last grand pattern scale with a keyboard smash when she missed the last note. "It helps me calm down and concentrate." She took a deep breath and restarted the last scale, going a little slower this time. "You should try it sometime."

"I never want to be forced to go to mass ever again." Jihyo laughed. "I almost fell asleep, and I feel like that's highly disrespectful."

Dahyun just hummed in response. The scale went well this time around. She made a mental note to go over it several times at home to work out her learned mistakes.

"Well, anyway, I'm going to pray for her today. Maybe it will help her, maybe it won't, but I'm going to give it a go."

"You are going to become a nun at this rate, Dahyun. Please don't." Jihyo grimaced, pulling a book of vocal exercises from her bag and opening it to a well-worn page about mid-way through.

Dahyun just giggled in response, allowing Jihyo to start her exercises while she looked over her sheet music and allowed her mind to wander while they waited for their other bandmates.

Hirai Momo was all she could think about after that... incident. At least she was going for a straight relationship this time around. Dahyun winced at her own thoughts, glancing around the room and at Jihyo as if to check she wasn't listening in telepathically.

Everyone had always told her she was much too conservative with her views on love and sexuality, so she tried her best to keep her mouth shut and her mind off such topics. Really, she just couldn't believe how... relaxed views of the majority had become. Though, of course she didn't say anything about that out loud. She would be beaten up. Physically by Jeongyeon who was in a loving lesbian relationship with Chaeyoung, and verbally by Jihyo who would also probably burst her eardrums with her intensely loud voice.

Dahyun just made sure to keep her mouth shut and act like nothing was wrong when they met up with Jeong and Chaeng at lunch. She had to admit, they were very cute with each other, but it just wasn't right... to see two girls together... like that. It made her skin crawl.

Dahyun hadn't realised that Jihyo had finished her exercises.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked, looking to the door, waiting for the rest of the members to show up.

Dahyun sighed.

"Nothing."

***

"Holy shit." Chaeyoung whispered, her eyes focusing somewhere off to the right-hand side of their lunch table.

"Language." Was Dahyun's automatic response, causing Jeongyeon to groan. Like usual, Chaeyoung ignored her and jutted her chin out to the side.

"She's dumping him."

Dahyun frowned and turned in the direction of interest. Momo was standing there, her arms filled with books, her hair tied back in a messy ponytail and her legs adorned with the shortest shorts that Dahyun had ever seen... well, they were much too short for her own moral code. In front of her stood Heechul, the man who had saved her from jumping off the roof one week ago. He looked half relieved, half disappointed, his shoulders slouched and his eyes questioning.

"What has it been... a week?" Jeongyeon's eyes were also fixed on the pair as they continued their intense conversation. "Hirai is like a drama television show. We should vlog her life."

"That's just creepy." Jihyo muttered. She had lost interest and returned her attention to her food.

"Nah I agree. I would pay to watch her fucked-up love life." Chaeyoung spoke.

"LANGUAGE!" Dahyun tried again. Failed again. Nobody ever listens to the church girl.

Heechul nodded sadly in Momo's general direction as he turned away and trudged off to the Medicine block. Her face was solemn, but Dahyun wondered what she was really feeling as she let Heechul go.

"It will be only a matter of seconds before she chooses her next victim." Chaeyoung spoke as if she were a David Attenborough voicing a rare animal documentary.

Jeongyeon and even Jihyo laughed at the stupid joke, while Dahyun just shook her head. She put the last spoonful of her food into her mouth and pilled all her rubbish into a plastic bag. The laughter died down all of a sudden, as Dahyun pulled her backpack onto her shoulder and stood from the table to place her rubbish into the bin and make her way over to the chapel for her afternoon prayers before class started.

"Hi!" An unfamiliar voice called from behind her. "You're Kim Dahyun, right?" Dahyun turned, slightly annoyed that her prayer time was being shaven off with every second she had to talk to this mystery person, but her face slackened when she saw who it was.

"Uh... yeah. Yes." She stuttered, looking into the eyes of Hirai Momo was intense. She was smiling. It was one with all her teeth showing and her eyes disappearing and her cheeks just beaming. It was almost very easy to forget that she had just dumped some guy rather heartlessly. She looked like the friendliest, most lovable human on earth right now.

"I just wanted to tell you that you're really pretty. I hope we can get to know each other better!" She bowed, but never lost eye contact.

"Ok?" Dahyun didn't know how to respond as Momo moved past her, leaving with a wink that left her cheeks a deep shade of red.

There was a long, uncomfortable silence as Dahyun and all her friends watched as Momo walked away, her raven hair swaying slightly along with the movement of her hips.

"So," Jihyo was the first to break the quiet, causing all eyes to look at her. She, however, was only looking at Dahyun. "What are you going to do?" She sniggered slightly. "Let her die?"

"Hold up." Dahyun raised her hands to stop Jihyo from speaking, then realising that she was still holding a bag full of rubbish, lowered them again. "What do you mean I'm gonna let her die?"

"Dahyun... of all people... the church girl." Jeongyeon spoke slowly, her eyes trailing along Dahyun's body teasingly. It made her squirm. She hated that sort of attention.

"What does that mean?" Dahyun folded her arms over her chest. Her voice was small because she knew. She knew exactly what that meant.

"So, are we gonna get to see some girl on girl action from our fellow nun?" Chaeyoung smirked and nudged her girlfriend with her shoulder when she didn't laugh.

Dahyun knew it wasn't at all ethical, in a religious nor the non-religious perspective to let someone commit suicide. That was a _sin_. She just had to hope that Momo wouldn't resort to that.

"No." Dahyun shook her head vigorously. "I'm not going to sin like that."

"Hey." Jeongyeon's joking mood darkened immediately with Dahyun's words. Chaeyoung gave up trying to force her to laugh at her joke and gripped her arm tightly to stop her from lunging at Dahyun.

"Wh-what I mean is..." Dahyun had to save herself a black eye and a broken friendship. So, she improvised. "I won't let her sin. Committing suicide. That's a sin. I won't let her do that." It was lame, but Jeongyeon calmed down, letting her off this time.

"Maybe we can just be friends. Maybe that's all she wants."

"Yeah, Dubu, that ain't gonna happen with Momo." Jihyo patted her shoulder a little too hard to reprimand her for the almost blunder. "It's all or nothing with her. You've seen it yourself."

Dahyun though for a moment.

"I guess you're right." She sighed. "I'll just have to keep up the prayers.

Everyone whined and groaned at that.

"What? Prayer is powerful. Don't underestimate it." And with that, she turned to finally make her way to the chapel for some well-earned alone time with God. She needed it.

It turned out that Dahyun... overestimated the power of her prayers.

***

"Hi, Dahyun-ah." Momo poked her head through the glass door of the practice room. Her hair was down today, the long locks flowing over her shoulders almost perfectly. Dahyun wished she had hair that nice.

"Good morning Hirai-ssi." Dahyun stood from her seat at the keyboard to bow slightly, then returned to her music. If she just acted like this was a normal occurrence, maybe Momo wouldn't try anything.

"I've always wanted to date a girl who played piano." Momo sighed, stepping through the door to approach Dahyun. That was... direct. Dahyun cleared her throat and tried to ignore the blush seeping into her cheeks at the comment.

"Oh?" She continued ghosting the chords, occasionally scribbling a note on the music. She pretended to be relaxed. "I don't think playing the piano should be the defining feature of what you are looking for in someone."

Momo was very close now, leaning over the keyboard to peer at the music. Of course, this was a guise to allow Dahyun a very... unpleasant view of her... chest area. She ignored it.

"Well, what do you think I should look for?" Momo's tone was suggestive and sensual.

Dahyun felt like poking her buttons, so she bluntly replied:

"A male for one." Momo's expression changed slightly. Her eyes darkened and her brows furrowed. "For two, someone who will work with you to bring you closer to heaven."

Dahyun played the 'God' card. Unfortunately, it always seemed to push people away from her, so this seemed like the perfect time to preach. Introducing God to someone who needs it _and_ getting rid of a potential weirdo who wanted nothing from her but... Dahyun did the sign of the cross in her mind.

"You're gonna make this difficult for me. Aren't you, Dahyunie?" Momo said after a small silence as she processed Dahyun's strange reply to her question.

Dahyun saw Jihyo and Chaeyoung behind Momo's shoulder about to walk in. They stopped when the realised Momo was in there with her. Their expressions were worried. Well, Jihyo's expression was worried. Both Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung had identical smirks on their face. Chaeyoung was about to lift her phone up to record when Jihyo grabbed her arm.

"What am I making difficult?" Dahyun played innocent and stupid.

But _Momo_ wasn't stupid. Nor was she innocent. She leaned forward, pressing her lips close to Dahyun's ear. She tensed up as Momo's fingers threaded through her blonde hair. Twirling a strand close to the base of her skull. It made her scalp feel tingly.

"You know exactly what I want from you." Her tone was low. Threatening. Dahyun had never heard a voice like it before. "You might think you're all good and holy now, but you won't be once I'm through with you." She left a soft peck, just below Dahyun's earlobe. Dahyun refused to move. "I'll make you sin for me." The whisper of air from her mouth formed the words. They seemed to lace around Dahyun's neck. She couldn't breathe.

Momo backed away, her expression remaining neutral as she strode out of the music room, brushing past Dahyun's stunned and bemused friends.

The silence as the girls walked into the room was deafening. Dahyun lifted a hand to touch the place where Momo had kissed her. She felt violated. Disgusted. Repulsed. The spot burned. Her mouth was hanging open in shock.

"A fly might fly into your mouth if you don't close it." Chaeyoung broke the silence with an unnecessarily awkward comment. Jeongyeon sniggered, kissing her girlfriend on the cheek before leaving in the same direction as Momo.

"Keep it in your pants Dahyun-ah!" She remarked as she left.

"You ok?" Jihyo asked Dahyun, but Dahyun's eyes were still on the receding figure of Momo as she walked further and further away.

"I'm going to the chapel. I'll be back." Dahyun muttered. She needed time to think. She needed to get away from everyone to process everything.

"No, you're not." Chaeyoung grasped her arm firmly. "We're practicing. You can go after practice."

Dahyun spent the entire practice with her mind floating elsewhere, unsure of how to approach the Momo situation. She didn't even know the girl except for her... sexual tendencies. Maybe if she got to know Momo as a person, she would be able to figure out her motives... and maybe make a good friend. She couldn't be all that bad. Right? Prayer will solve anything if you believe.

So Dahyun continued to pray.

With no result.

***

Dahyun never got the chance to get to know Momo personally. Momo didn't allow her to.

"Dahyunie!" The voice was familiar and loud inside the library. Dahyun winced as she looked over her shoulder to see Momo walking toward her with that grin of hers stretched across her face. She made a point of sitting in the cubical directly next to Dahyun's even though there were several empty seats.

"Hello, Hirai-ssi." Dahyun said to be polite, but she kept her head down, revising the theory for a new piece she was learning.

Momo had been seeking her out in every way possible for the past two days. Following her into the library (now was one of those times), waiting to talk to her after music practice, trying to separate her from her friends at lunch... Dahyun had even run into her by accident in the bathrooms. That sure was awkward.

"What are you reading?" Momo's voice had a cute lilt to it, though Dahyun would never admit it. In her mind it was annoying.

"My music theory." Maybe this was a chance to bring up some sort of mundane subject to get to know Momo better. Dahyun had tried and failed countless times over the past two days. Maybe today was the day? Dahyun was just about to ask, when Momo's hand found its way to her knee.

Dahyun tensed as Momo's fingers moved higher and higher. Lightly grazing her skin, causing the knee-length skirt she was wearing to bunch up.

"You're paying so much attention to that book." Momo's voice... her voice... Dahyun's cheeks burned as her hand played with the hem of her skirt. "It's making me jealous." This was the first time Momo had been so bold. Touching her. She hadn't touched her before. Dahyun moved her leg slightly in an attempt to move Momo off, but it didn't work. She didn't like this.

"It's silly to be jealous of a book." Dahyun managed to whisper as the hand finally slipped up her skirt to caress her inner thigh. She looked around to see if anyone was watching. They weren't.

"Please don't touch me like that." Dahyun breathed, unable to explain the sensation that was building up in between her legs. Her mind was screaming for Momo to move her hand just a little higher. Just enough... to...

"Why not?" Momo's breath reached her ear. Her fingers were between her legs, soft and gentle. Resting against Dahyun's underwear. Dahyun shuddered at the sensation, her heart beating in a rhythm she wasn't familiar with.

_Why not?_

"I don't..." Dahyun's mouth opened wide when Momo moved the fabric aside and pushed her fingers inside her. A white noise clouded her thoughts and vision. She felt hot.

That was the line for Dahyun. The line Momo shouldn't have crossed. She yanked her hand away and stood up quickly. She almost stumbled and fell, which caused Momo to hold onto her instinctively. Dahyun pulled away a second time, grasping her book bag and theory textbook. Her hands weren't working the way she wanted them to and she dropped everything.

Momo's expression remained neutral, her dark eyes observing as Dahyun fumbled with her belongings. Her face was red. Her eyes were teary.

"I don't like it. That's why." Dahyun eventually replied, her eyes looking deep into Momo's. But she couldn't spot any guilt or regret. Nothing. She looked around again. People were watching the pair. Their eyes were curious, judging.

Dahyun was stupid to think she could get to know Hirai Momo, she thought as she walked away from the library, trying to decipher what the burning ache between her legs meant.

It was strange when Dahyun found herself in the library again the next day. It was strange to think she was sitting in that cubical, waiting for someone.


	2. SIN

THE FIRST SIN; **LUST**

Sure enough, Momo appeared, wearing those shorts that were just that little bit too short and her beautiful hair tied back perfectly like always. And the smile. That smile was beginning to have an effect on Dahyun.

Dahyun started the conversation today, determined to get an answer and an eventual apology.

"What was it that you did to me yesterday?" Dahyun knew what it was. But her mind still needed the clarification. "Why did you do it? In a library of all places!" She kept her voice down, trying not to attract the attention of the very few students that remained in at this time in the afternoon.

Momo's expression changed. The corner of her mouth lifted up. Her eyebrows sunk slightly. She reached forward and cupped Dahyun's cheek. The pressure between Dahyun's legs had not gone away since yesterday. Momo's touch just made it worse. She forced her own hand to remain hanging at her side. Not allowing it to reach up and touch Momo's hand.

"Do you want to know, Dahyun-ah?"

Dahyun didn't know what the heck she was doing. She didn't understand the sudden desperation she had for Momo to touch her again. What she really wanted was an apology. A _"Sorry Dahyun-ah. I shouldn't have touched you when you didn't want me to."_ Or something.

"Do you want me to touch you?" She whispered. The hand that wasn't caressing her cheek lingered on the waist band of her jeans. In that moment, Dahyun wondered who Hirai Momo was. She wondered who she herself was. She still didn't know how old she was... who her friends were... what her favourite foods were... what music she liked...

But who was Dahyun? The girl standing still and letting someone... a girl, touch her like that?

"I'll take you right here." She murmured, leaning down and kissing her beneath her jaw. Dahyun could smell her hair. A sweet clean smell. It was suddenly her favourite. A sound that Dahyun didn't want to make... a sound she didn't know she could make, slipped out of her mouth.

"Such a pretty voice." Momo murmured into her ear. "But you have to be quiet. This is a library."

What the... Dahyun broke from her trance. She took a step back. Her head was reeling. What was she doing? What was this feeling... the thoughts in her head... her mind wandering to the outline of Momo's chest or down the gentle curve of her hips? The smell of her clouding out everything... This was wrong. She knew that. She'd been told countless times. She told herself countless more.

She knew, but it was like she was seeing Hirai Momo for the first time. It was like she was forgetting God, forgetting what her kindergarten teachers and everyone else at her church had told her all those years ago.

_Girls are not for kissing, Kim Dahyun._

She wasn't herself.

"No." Dahyun said, more to herself than to Momo who remained in place. That dangerous smile did not waver. Dahyun clenched her fists and gritted her teeth. "No?" She repeated. Momo chuckled at her tone.

"I'm not forcing you." She spoke softly. "But I _will_ make you mine Kim Dahyun. Eventually."

"That's contradictory." Dahyun growled. She was so angry at herself and at Momo. Her eyes scanned the faces of the students in the library once again. Nobody was looking.

"You want me to touch you. I can see it in your eyes." Momo wasn't making any moves toward her, but Dahyun felt cornered all the same.

Because she found that she _did_ want Momo to touch her. She _wanted_ to be hers. She _wanted_ to feel like how she did yesterday when Momo's fingers had moved just that little bit too far.

"So, what if I do?" She asked, stupidly, her face was immediately flushed with red.

What was she _thinking_? What was happening? Couldn't she think before she speaks?

Momo stepped forward and Dahyun found herself meeting her halfway, unintentionally taking one of Momo's hands in her own and pulling it down to rest on the button of her jeans. Momo looked surprised, but only for a second.

"Good girl." She said, taking Dahyun by the waist and pulling her behind a shelf where nobody would see. "You're mine."

Dahyun let Momo unravel her.

This was only curiosity. Right?

This wasn't something bad. People Dahyun's age did these things all the time. Right?

But Dahyun didn't do things like this. Ever.

Maybe everyone heard Dahyun's voice that day. Maybe nobody did.

But all of a sudden, Dahyun didn't care.

THE SECOND SIN; **GLUTTONY**

The more and more that Dahyun thought about Momo, the more and more she needed her. She needed her in a way that didn't quite make sense just yet, but she was beginning to understand when Momo kissed her harshly in the practice room on a Thursday afternoon.

Dahyun had never kissed anyone before. Never ever (not counting her earliest memories from kindergarten). But if she had known that kisses were so soft and hard at the same time with the taste of Hirai Momo's lip gloss and her tongue forcing its way into her mouth and the smell of her hair intoxicating her, she would have had her first kiss long ago.

Her hands were allowed to touch Momo wherever she wanted.

Momo had told her she could.

Her hands were allowed to venture up her t-shit and across her toned stomach. Her hands were allowed to pull down the straps of Momo's bra. Her hands were allowed to explore the softness of her breasts. Dahyun had never felt skin softer or smoother than Momo's. And the sounds that came out of her mouth... the sounds that trailed from Momo's lips to Dahyun's ears like a drip of honey were the most beautiful music that she had ever heard.

Dahyun couldn't get enough.

Dahyun forgot who she was when she was with Momo.

Clothes suddenly became a hinderance.

"Lift your arms for me." Momo's voice... Dahyun was addicted to the sound of it. She would do anything that voice told her to. So, she lifted her arms and her shirt was tossed aside. Dahyun didn't think anymore. She just moved. Moved to the rhythm that Momo set for her.

Momo paused to look. Her eyes burned into Dahyun's skin.

"Gorgeous." Nobody had ever called Dahyun _gorgeous_. It made her stomach feel funny and for the first time, she wanted someone to look at her body. To praise it. Momo's eyes didn't look at her the way some of the boys she had tried to date had. Momo's eyes seemed to kiss every inch of Dahyun's skin. To draw her name all over her with her gaze. This was different.

Momo hooked her fingers on the strap of Dahyun's bra and leaned in, kissing the top of her chest. Dahyun's legs were weak. Momo shoved her up against the keyboard, sucking on her neck. Kissing her again as she removed her bra.

"I'm going to take you again." Momo muttered between wet kisses all over Dahyun's mouth and breasts.

That's when Dahyun stopped her, pushing her shoulders back and glaring, her chest heaving.

"No." She pushed her backward again, Momo's eyes widening. "I'm going to take you."

Dahyun didn't know what she was doing, but as long as Momo's voice was singing out like that, she knew it was right.

She didn't let Momo go until she had tasted her. Even then, she wouldn't.

She didn't remember how many times Momo had cried out and screamed her name. She didn't remember anything. All she knew was the taste of her.

It was good.

She never got enough.

THE THIRD SIN; **GREED**

"Where are you going Dahyun?" Jihyo asked as Dahyun suddenly closed her sheet music and shoved it into her bag. "We still have ten minutes left!"

Ten minutes is too long.

"I have to go." Was all she offered as a response, leaving swiftly through the glass doors and running into the arms of her Momo. Dahyun didn't know what to call her. She didn't know a thing about her, so she couldn't call her a friend. Dahyun would sooner drop out of school than admit she had a girlfriend, so that wasn't it either. So, in her mind, she just settled with _My Momo_.

Her rationality told her she was stupid. Her heart told her she was wise.

She didn't realise that there were stares on her back as she was enveloped into Momo's embrace. She had been waiting for her. Her hugs were almost as amazing as her kisses and her fingers when they curled inside her. It felt like she was made to be there, held by Momo.

Her rationality told her she was making a mistake.

Her conscience told her she was never made for Momo. She was made for God in heaven.

Her heart sung out Momo's name and drowned them out.

"I want you." Dahyun cried desperately, causing Momo to chuckle.

"You're adorable." Her hand cupped her cheek. Something strange passed in and out of Momo's expression, though Dahyun didn't pay much attention. The pressure in between her legs was too much. It was all she could think about these days. Momo and the relief she would receive with her touch. "I'm not going to do you here."

Her lips found Dahyun's and it was almost too much for Dahyun to bare when she pulled away.

"Let's go to the bathroom."

***

It was the fourth time this week that Dahyun was disappearing, not showing up or leaving early from practice. Jihyo and Chaeyoung and their other bandmates would look on in horror as she met Hirai Momo outside.

Dahyun had changed. Dramatically. She had always been the one against sex before marriage. She was always against homosexuality. Now, Jihyo couldn't recognise her best friend. Here she was, having premarital sex with a woman. Hypocritical. And Dahyun hated hypocrites. She was never in the chapel. She barely talked with them. It was like her whole world... all of its meaning had suddenly become translated to mean _Hirai Momo_. It was as if nothing else mattered to her.

Rumours were flying around the university. Stories of oral in the library, making out in bathroom stalls, fucking inside a lecture hall. It had been more than a week. And within that short span of time, Dahyun's name was suddenly known throughout the school. Simply because Hirai Momo could be heard screaming her name from the rooftop.

Jihyo was worried. And Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung had long since abandoned their laughs and jokes about their nun friend dating a sex addict. As much as all three of them despised Dahyun's overtly religious outlook on life and her views on homosexuality, they missed them. They missed Dahyun telling them to shut up when they wanted to say 'fuck'. They missed her trying to convince them to follow her to the chapel after class. They wished she would run up to them and rant about why being gay was wrong and a sin.

But, Dahyun wasn't like that anymore.

Hirai Momo wasn't good for her.

They had to get rid of her.

"I'm scared." Chaeyoung spoke. Her hand was intertwined with Jeongyeon's as they walked with Jihyo across the courtyard to the sports block. They had found out from word of mouth that Momo took a dance major. Now they were on their way to stop her from _corrupting_ their best friend. It was funny to say it like that since Dahyun had always thought they that were the corrupted ones with relaxed views. "I'm really worried about her."

Neither Jihyo nor Jeongyeon needed to respond, because they were both in agreement.

The group soon stood outside the dance studio, each with their bodies tensed and ready.

"I'm not opening it." Chaeyoung said, pushing her body behind Jeongyeon's. Jihyo rolled her eyes.

"I will." She pushed the door inward.

Their ears were immediately assaulted with lewd noises floating from the back of the room.

"I'm out." Chaeyoung let go of Jeongyeon and bolted away, but her girlfriend and Jihyo stayed, trying to block out the horrific noises.

"DAHYUN?" Jeongyeon yelled unexpectedly. There was an immediate silence. "DHAYUN IS THAT YOU?" She called again.

After a few more seconds, someone appeared from a door to their left. It wasn't Dahyun. It was Momo. Her hair was messy, her cheeks were flushed, her neck was red with a trail of bruises that both Jeongyeon and Jihyo knew Dahyun had made. She looked as though she had just thrown on whatever clothes she had within the vicinity. She was wearing Dahyun's shirt. The one that said, "Trust in God, your saving grace."

"What do you want?" Her voice was deep and dark.

"We want you to leave Dahyun alone. For good. This isn't like her at all." Jihyo spoke. Her fists were clenched at her sides and her eyes flicked to the door that Momo had emerged from nervously as if waiting for Dahyun to appear.

"She wants to be with me." Momo replied. She shifted on her feet. Was she... nervous? Jihyo looked at her suspiciously, wondering if her body language was really how she felt on the inside. Her voice was certainly murderous, but who knew what her intentions were?

"No, she doesn't you bitch. You're just going to throw her away like you do with every other one of your flings. Dahyun doesn't deserve that."

Momo raised her brows.

"Who said I'm going to throw her away?"

"YOU KNOW YOU WILL." Jeongyeon cried. "LEAVE HER ALONE, OR I'LL KILL YOU."

Jihyo, shocked at Jeongyeon's claim, nudged her with her elbow.

"I'm serious Hirai. I'll kill you. Just like you've wanted all this time."

Momo's expression remained neutral. She looked into Jihyo and Jeongyeon's eyes in turn. Something different seemed to come over her disposition. Jihyo wondered what that look meant.

"Give her back." Jeongyeon glared.

THE FOURTH SIN; **ENVY**

It wasn't funny to watch Hirai Momo break up with her latest fling. Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung couldn't crack a single joke as they watched their best friend's face crumple into tears.

They couldn't hear the conversation, but the body language was clear as day. Momo's posture was composed, her expression neutral apart from an occasional frown that Jeongyeon and Chaeyoung perceived as hatred or anger. Jihyo saw it differently... though she couldn't place exactly what emotions that Momo might be feeling.

Dahyun on the other hand, was easier to read. She desperately grasped at Momo's hands, tried to reach to cup her face, grasped chunks of her own hair in her fists. Tears poured down her cheeks. Her face was melted into a permanent look of despair.

Until Momo walked away. Just like she had done to every other one of her flings.

Dahyun sunk to her knees and broke.

Her friends rushed up to her, surrounding her with a hug that she accepted reluctantly.

Momo was gone.

"She c-can't leave me like this!" Dahyun cried. "This isn't fair!" Her voice was like nothing Jeongyeon, Chaeyoung or Jihyo had ever known. A desperate cry for help. Her hands gripped onto Chaeyoung's shoulders like she was a lifeline. She didn't see what was in front of her. Only Momo, walking further and further away.

Jihyo wondered if they ever should have interfered.

***

Dahyun had returned to her normal behaviour soon after her... break up? Jihyo didn't know what she should call it because every time they had asked her about Momo, she had denied being in a relationship with her.

 _"I don't agree with that sort of relationship."_ She had said. _"To me, that's a sin."_ But she did it anyway.

After Momo had left her in a puddle of tears, Dahyun had collected herself in a matter of days, quicker than Jihyo had thought, and returned to her daily chapel visits, normal practice schedules and stayed far away from the library and the Sports block. Jihyo was optimistic about her recovery from the emotional bit, but she was still worried. There was always something odd in Dahyun's eyes. Something she couldn't place.

***

Dahyun knelt in the chapel, looking at the cross above the tabernacle. She had said that she was sorry. A million times, but never had the courage to take the step and walk into the confessional. To say her sins out loud. Because she surely had sinned, and it was eating her up from the inside out.

She had looked at Momo's body, she had slept with her countless times, she had tasted her, she had worshiped her, she was another woman. And she craved Momo's touch, even now, as she knelt in front of God himself. She felt dirty. Caked in a theoretical mud made from the dreadful sins she committed. But that wasn't the only issue.

She wanted to drown in that mud. Sin and sin and sin again. Let Momo take her away from God and use her until she was dead. Drown and die and go to hell as long as Momo could touch her again.

_"So, you're a Catholic?" Momo asked her, tracing something on Dahyun's naked stomach as they lay on the floor of the dance studio. It was kind of uncomfortable on the wooden floor, but as long as Momo had her hands on Dahyun's skin, she didn't care._

_Dahyun hummed in response, all her attention focused on Momo's hand as it moved higher to cup her breast._

_"Isn't this... I don't know... wrong?"_

_"What do you mean?" Dahyun turned to look at her Momo. Her eyes were glistening slightly in the dim light of the room. Her hair was plastered to her face and her cheeks were rosy. She was so beautiful, though, Dahyun would never tell her that._

_Momo's hands moved again, up and up until she rested her hand against Dahyun's cheek._

_"Aren't Catholics the religion who hate gay people and sex before marriage and all that? Isn't this... sin?'_

_Dahyun's heart raced._

_"Well, no." She was thinking of excuses. Like the hypocrite she was. "I'm not gay. And sex should be between a man and a woman. Right?" She was talking to herself. Not Momo. "So, this doesn't count. And besides," Momo pulled her hand away from Dahyun's cheek and sat up. "I can just go and confess this later and all will be forgiven."_

_Momo wiped something from her eye and reached over to the left of her body to grab her underwear._

_"So, none of this means anything to you?" She asked nonchalantly. She pulled on her bra and underpants before standing up to gather the rest of the clothes they had scattered across the room. "Just something you're doing for the thrill of sinning?"_

_Dahyun didn't really know how to answer that._

She still didn't.

After making a half-hearted sign of the cross, Dahyun left the chapel, her thoughts still on Momo's body as she made her way to the music room.

"I'll kill myself if you don't go out with me!" The familiar voice caused Dahyun's vision to tunnel. Turning her head up, her eyes seemed to zoom in onto Momo's face. It was streaked with tears, her bottom lip trembling. Dahyun wanted to run to her in an instant and wipe the tears and kiss her cheeks until they all stopped, until she saw who was next to her.

"Don't be a dumb bitch Hirai." The woman standing beside Momo, a beautiful girl with bunny teeth, took her arm and jerked her back. Dahyun realised that they were on top of a building. On the roof. This was just like that day with Heechul. Momo, throwing her life away for some stupid dates and the sex that came along with it.

This was the same as that day, except for the burning inside Dahyun's stomach.

"I'll give you one date you useless, fuck." The woman said, her voice angry and firm, but her eyes showing the real fear. The fear that Momo would actually jump if she ever said no.

Dahyun wanted Momo to push her off instead.

"Hold on." Dahyun said to herself, watching the pair walk back from the edge, Momo's tears long gone and the other woman's hand still gripping her upper arm.

_What the hell am I thinking?_

THE FIFTH SIN; **WRATH**

_"You're so pretty, Dahyun. Don't let anyone hurt this body." Her tongue was everywhere. It made Dahyun want to scream. "Don't let anyone ever make a mark on your skin." Momo was marking her. Momo was using her teeth and her mouth and making a pattern of bruises all over her. "You deserve to have the world at your feet."_

_Dahyun is sure that Momo must be in pain due to how hard her hands were squeezing fistfuls of her hair as her head lowered between her legs._

_"You're my God Dahyun." She said before her tongue caused Dahyun's thoughts to leave her head entirely._

Dahyun was angry. She wanted to punch a wall or hurt herself.

She found her own legs walking toward Momo and her mystery woman on their own accord.

She wanted to hurt Momo the way Momo had hurt her. She wanted Momo to feel though physical pain the way her emotions were screwing with her head right now. She wanted to grab her by the neck and strangle her until she apologised for something she didn't do.

But when she was within a metre from her, the woman beside her glanced over and nudged Momo under the table they were sitting at.

"Dahyunie?" Momo's voice was quiet. Dahyun's fists that were once clenched together, suddenly lost their strength. "Are you alright?" Her eyes were just like she remembered.

_Momo wouldn't close her eyes even when they were kissing. When Dahyun had asked her why, she had replied with something that made her laugh._

_"I want to look at you."_

_"What? Is that some sort of kink?" Dahyun wrapped her arms around Momo's neck, pulling her impossibly close without their lips touching._

_"Maybe." Momo replied, though the tone of her voice told Dahyun it wasn't. Those deep dark eyes just stared into her own with an emotion that Dahyun never learned how to read._

_"Just let me look." She breathed_.

"I hate you." It slipped out of Dahyun's mouth and once it did, everything else did too. "I hate everything about you. You're a player and a whore and all you do is run around using people for your own pleasure. It's sick."

Dahyun felt powerful when Momo's eyes released a tear.

"I know you're gonna dump her too. Just like you did to Heechul and to me and to everyone else before that. Does it get you off? Do you like hurting people?"

The woman beside Momo glanced around. People were watching. Dahyun was much too loud.

_"Shhhh!" Momo tried to cover Dahyun's mouth as her hand continued its work between her legs. "To loud, sweetie."_

_Dahyun couldn't help it. She felt so good._

_"Momo..." She whined. "I'm sorry... I... Oh... my God..."_

_Momo smiled, placing her mouth over Dahyun's as she sang out to the whole university. Singing Momo's name like it was the halleluiah from her prayers. Momo liked it when she was loud._

"I hurt you?" Momo's voice was tiny, and her eyes were wide.

"I should have just let you jump off a building. That's what you want right? To die!" Dahyun screamed. She couldn't take it anymore.

She couldn't live a second without Momo. She couldn't even breathe without her invading her thoughts. She couldn't even blink without seeing her behind her lids. It was like the world was screaming at her, all the time.

MOMO. MOMO. MOMO.

And she was sick of it.

Two powerful arms snatched her from behind.

"Dahyun, stop." It was Jihyo, pulling her away from the one thing on the earth that was keeping her sane, though it seemed the opposite.

"I HATE YOU." She cried again, yanking forward against Jihyo's arms. Momo flinched and her body heaved with a sob. Dahyun had never seen her cry like that.

It was killing her as much as it was fuelling her anger and hatred.

"I HATE YOU."

THE SIXTH SIN; **SLOTH**

_"It's late. We should get to class."_

_"No. Please just lie with me for a while."_

***

_"Are we gonna go to lunch?"_

_"What do you think?"_

***

_"Don't fall asleep on me Dahyun!"_

_"Too bad."_

***

_"Just sleep here. With me. Forever."_

***

Dahyun had managed to get out of bed, onto the train and into the practice room. She had managed to remember her sheet music and a pencil to write with. She managed to open the lid of the piano and sit down with the music in front of her. But she couldn't play a single note. She didn't want to.

She let her thoughts run free as she stared blankly at the black and white keys.

Of course, they ran to Momo. They always did.

"What are you thinking about?"

THE SEVENTH AND FINAL SIN; **PRIDE**  


Dahyun's head lifted. It was Momo. Her hair down and looking exactly how she had all those months ago when she had talked to her in the music room.

"You're always thinking about something and I never know what it is." She continued, staying close to the door, her hands clenched together, and her eyebrows furrowed.

"You don't need to know what I'm thinking about." Dahyun stated. She didn't even know what she was supposed to think about.

"No." Momo sighed. "I-I don't need to know. But I want to know." She released her hands and she ran one through her hair. It was shaking. "I don't think my intensions were clear when we were..."

"When we were having sex? Your intensions were clear as day, Momo. Don't test me." Dahyun looked away from her and stared at the first note on the page. A C natural. Such a stupid, generic note.

"No." Momo swallowed. "I wasn't using you. Well, I was at first, but –"

"I said don't try me."

"I love you."

Dahyun looked away from the C natural. Momo was standing there, looking small and scared. Like she was naked in front of millions. Like she was being publicly humiliated. Her heart started beating again.

"I fell in love by accident and I didn't know how to... say it." She swallowed again. "I don't say it. So, I felt like... I just... you make me feel so different to anyone else... I don't... I'm..."

Dahyun didn't know how to process the words that Momo was speaking. Her heart raced. Her cheeks flushed. She felt like Momo was embracing her again. Like she was safe in her arms for good. Like she was protected. Like everything would be ok again.

But that was her heart.

Her rationality told her she was making a mistake.

Her conscience told her that she was going to sin again.

"My intensions mustn't have been clear either." Dahyun said, raising her hands into the position to play the first note on her sheet music. "I'm not going to sin like that. I'm straight. I'm not stooping to your level."

Dahyun shut off her emotions and heart. She let her rationality take over. She let her corrupted conscience move her fingers across the keys. The major chords filled the holes that Momo had left in her mind.

"Alright." Momo's voice was heard only slightly above the pounding of Dahyun's fingers against the keys.

Dahyun wouldn't let herself listen to the breaking of her own heart as Momo walked away.

***

"I love you." Jeongyeon told Chaeyoung, kissing her on the cheek before leaving her and Jihyo to walk into the music room alone. Dahyun was already there.

But something was wrong.

"Can you not do that in front of me?" Dahyun's fingers halted on the piano. Her eyes stared daggers into Chaeyoung's. "Stop sinning so obviously."

_Dahyun was a hypocrite and she knew it._

"Hey." Jihyo was about to give her the nth lecture about love being free and for everyone before Dahyun's tears started to run.

"It's wrong. I don't even want to be friends with you guys if you want to endorse this sort of lifestyle."

Something was wrong.

"It's disgusting. It's not biologically possible. It's not part of God's plan."

Chaeyoung couldn't be offended. Not when her best friend was crying like that.

"You should all – all three of you – go to confession."

"Dahyun, what's going on?" Jihyo spoke gently.

"I would never stoop so low. Not to your level." Dahyun shoved a finger in Chaeyoung's direction, spit flying from her mouth.

"I would never fall for a woman. I would never commit that sin."

_I love you too. I'm sorry._


End file.
